Rage Against Suburban Zombie-ism
Wednesday, June 03, 2015
This past weekend, I went to a high school reunion of sorts. It was to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the school. I didn't originally purchase the ticket, but a friend couldn't go, so I was asked to take her place.
I thought to myself:
1) I ain't fat;
2) I didn't age badly, &/or;
3) My work is really picking up, so why the fuck not??!!
So you know how the type of car men drive is basically their form of a dick measuring contest? Well, women's version of the 'dick measuring contest' are:
1) Their looks. Have they gained a significant amount of weight, looking like a shadow of their former selves, a.k.a. high school version of themselves if we're referring to a h.s. reunion. Have they aged badly? Do they have wrinkles 'n shit like that;
2) What their husband/bf/SO looks like and what he does in life. Props go out to professions such as doctors, lawyers, &; other jobs where their male partner comes back with a shitload of bills. Bonus points for a hottie DILF who doesn't have a beer belly and has a full head of hair;
3) If you happen to be single, what is your profession? Are YOU making a shitload of money?
That's basically it. So have we really evolved since high school??
P.S. Since this dumb reunion, all these chicks who never really spoke to me back in da day are adding me on FB. What gives??? Hell, I'll take it as free advertising. ;)
P.P.S. I'm totally the Janeane Garofalo of Romy & Michele's High School Reunion!
posted by Stephania at 12:54 pm
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