Rage Against Suburban Zombie-ism
Wednesday, January 16, 2013

NOOOOOGA,
a.k.a. that shit HURTS, yo!

After quite a few classes of Bikram + 1 "regular" yoga class, I've determined that it's not for me. Dunno why it took me soo long to figure it out, but what's important is that it didn't cost me a trip to India or even a small fortune spent in Lululemon attire. 

Here are my reasons for saying no to yoga or as I like to call it, NOga: 
1. How can anyone lose weight on this shit?? Improve your flexibility? Yes. But lose weight? I don't think so; 
2. Depending on whether or not any music is playing at the time, I cannot fart in yoga class. And sometimes, depending on what I ate before, I hafta fart real bad;
3.  It's a bit too positive for me.  I like to live in the realm of realism mixed with a healthy dose of sarcasm, and; 
4.  It hurts real bad and feels unnatural. Holding your bodyweight on your palms? Vertical splits in the air? Headstand?  Oooouchie! 

If my favourite poses are child's pose and savasana, a.k.a. corpse pose, I can safely say that this is not the activity pour moi!

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posted by Stephania at 11:32 pm
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