Rage Against Suburban Zombie-ism
Thursday, August 27, 2009

Car = Status Symbol

I remember an LA Publicist telling me that she had to get a new car. She had an "old" BMW.

(I have no idea what her definition of "old" was...in car years. In people years, 25 seems over-the-hill in LA!)

Anyway, when I asked her what was wrong with her existing car, she said, in her adapted-British accent, "Nothing...I just can't roll up to a premiere in a beat-up jalopy! You know what I mean?" (Okay, she didn't exactly use jalopy, but I *love* that word!) She was looking for sympathy that I could not provide.

Aside: I wasn't able to drive 'til I was like 18-19 and even then, my mom was soo stingy with the car! Her excuses ranged from it's too dark/snowing/raining/"I need it", etc. All lies. So even when I was stuck in rush-hour traffic, I enjoyed the freedom of driving.

Back to the Publicist...
I didn't understand where she was coming from. I just cracked it up to some weird LA-thing. It was only today, however, that this wise Publicist's words came full circle.

While on my way home from work, I notice the back of a gray van with a patchy paint job, i.e. panel of door was an entirely different shade altogether. As I drove alongside it, I see rust stains and hear a rattling. It was a pure wreck. I'm sure it wouldn't pass an emissions test. If all this wasn't bad enough, there was a business graphic on the side: FRESH COAT PAINTERS. Don't google it 'cause it's actually a real live company. My brain's just too damn fried to think of another ironic alternative!

I hate to judge - I actually love it! - but if that van rolled up to my house, I'd hafta think twice about hiring them. And if I listened to everyone and got a "real job", let's say a realtor, I'd hafta ditch my Honda Civic hatchback with bird shit on the windshield (I don't care) and no A/C!

I guess I'd also hafta lie and say that I don't live with my momz.

P.S. My iconic cool car will forever be the Lamborghini Countach!


posted by Stephania at 6:43 pm
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